Utopia : The Land of My Soul
Wednesday, July 12, 2006
Life can be whetting as on a razor's edge....
There are certain incidents that propels you to re-structure the settings of your mind - they flabbergast you, completely take you appalled and gaped, make you squirming in pain that cannot be seen with naked eyes, they contort your world of colours...
In the recent past, I have manifested something that has rebuilt my train of thoughts and cinched my perception of life. On Sunday last, the ignominious 9th of July, my close buddy's father expired. He was suffering from Cancer, the lethal disease that corrodes your body. I have seen uncle die each day as he was subsisting on life support, leading a vegetable life as the power to speak was also snatched away from him.
We, college friends, queued up at her place to be by her side during uncle's last rites. The ironic part of the situation was quite sombre-she had lost her mother earlier when she was in the 9th standard. And, the sarcasm of Fate was such that her father's death left her to be the only survivor in the family!
Life was too demanding on her. She was ready for the impending loss as she knew her father was diagnosed in the irrecoverable stage, from where bouncing back seemed a distant star in the galaxy. But the doom would come so soon!
We accompanied her, with her relatives, to the cremation ghat. Oh! what a murky sight. I had never ever gone to such places in my life. The sight of the place itself disgusted me to no end. the smell was so obnoxious that i felt like i was choked. My friend was rock-solid and publicly showed no sign of grief. To see her crumbling from inside yet stifling her emotions, was an experience in itself. On top of that, she performed all the rites as if she was an automated doll, she was doing because she needed to, just like an automaton needs to do its work. That day was too gloomy. And I saw dead bodies queuing up one after the other, as if there was no end to suffer death and to live amidst death was utter mockery. As if Death itself was laughing at us.
After the cremation rites were over, my friend and her relatives were waiting to receive the left over ashes to immerse it in Ganga. I was just standing by the shore of the river, waiting for them to join. I saw the ripples glistening in the Sun gleefully as if trying to console the near ones of the departed, that life doesn't halt after death has played its card. Yes, that is life...dicey on a razor's edge, has death lurking on the corners to pounce on you, while life itself is the inviting, tempting darling pushing you to move further and further....
